Pirates of the Caribbean

Cue obligatory pictures:







My first obsession - for about five years (probably more) and counting - I have been hooked, line and sinker, on the amazing trilogy of movies titled 'PIRATES OF THE CARIBBEAN'. I've watched all of them so many times that the DVDs are more scratched than Homer Simpson's fat arse. They're just so cool (Homer's arse to a lesser extent.). The FX are epic (well, in the context of the time they were filmed at, I suppose - THE CURSE OF THE BLACK PEARL's undead skeleton pirates have about the realism of kindergarten drawings next to AVATAR's CGI (like, AVATAR is jaw-dropping in 3D!)), acting is awesome (I salute you, Depp (!!! - more on him later), Rush, and Nighy. Keira, honorable mention. Orlando, darling, you're hot, and I love your character (Will Turner), but maybe you should model instead.), scenery is cool (thanks in part to the supercalifragilistically huge budgets of the sequels) and....aww, just fantastic, okay? (Just nod your head.)
I suppose part of the reason these movies have endeared themselves to me so much is that I read almost every book in my primary school's library, and some of them were about pirates, and I enjoyed these stories immensely. I loved the pirates' freedom, to do whatever the hell they wanted to do, and get away with it. TREASURE ISLAND was (and still is) a favourite of mine. (Also, I must mention that I have always wanted to know how to swordfight. I have a list ('Stuff To Do Before You Snuff It') and learning to fence is, I do believe, in the top ten. (I'll post that list someday.))
I simply don't understand why people (critics of these movies, for example) say that the sequels to THE CURSE OF THE BLACK PEARL have convoluted plot lines and are too difficult to understand, and are too long. I got everything the first time round. And the longer a movie is, the longer the escape from boring, old, non-piratey, physics-bound reality. If your problem is that you can't hold on long enough, tough. Buy the DVD. I guarantee you won't regret it.
This movie series has also given me an enduring interest in film scores. How Hans Zimmer never won anything for his awe-inspiring work on Pirates confounds me to this day.
I must say that I was pleased, but quite puzzled when the powers that be at Disney decided Pirates 4 was worth backing. I was content with the ending provided by AT WORLD'S END (Sparrow chasing Barbossa and the Black Pearl once again), and I have this niggling suspicion that Pirates 4 is a money grab (what a shame). As a result, I am wary in regards to this movie; I don't want such a good series to flop at the end (for cricket fans, I compare such an event occuring, to the ending of Matthew Hayden's career representing Australia). On the other hand, perhaps I should keep an open mind; Captain Jack Sparrow is back, after all.